Family Sing-Alongs and Old Sluts on Junk: Season's Greetings to All

In Christmas movies the whole family stands around the piano singing carols and smiling creepily at one another, while in reality you watch and comment that no family ever does that. Yeah, well I came from the kind of family that totally did that, though in our defense it was with less smiling and more scotch.

I can't play piano as well as my father did and I'm not religious in the slightest, so on the off-chance that I do one day have kids and the state does let me keep them, I can't imagine much carol-fueled family bonding around a piano. But there will surely be a good deal of scotch-fueled singing around the internet, because the internet feeds you the lyrics and what stupid piano ever did that for you?

And in the spirit of the season, I invite you all to sing along with me to the hands-down best Christmas song ever: The Pogues' Fairytale of New York. 

I'm totally ready for my offspring, now.

Happy Christmas your arse.